The Necropolitan Sentinel

I can't believe You People would think it's just fine for the NRA to be so crass as to drag poor Sushi and Malaria into the morass of the political swamp.

Heavens to Murgatroyd!

When Her Royal Highness, Queen Nancy the Hammer-wielder, brought kids to her swearing-in as Speaker, it was for the greater purpose of reminding us that what she does, she does For. The. Children! She was rightly praised up and down in the press for doing so. It was, after all, a fine example of her warm, maternal nature and an indicator that her rule would be that of a Collaborative Woman Who Collaborates And Stuff Because She's A Woman.

I don't want to hear any of your bull honky about how Newt Gingrich did exactly the same thing when he was sworn in as Speaker, yet no one in the press praised him for it, or even remembers. Newt is ugly. And pasty. And crazy Reichwing stuff comes out of his crazy, ugly, pasty face.

And I know what's coming next: David Letterman…Willow Palin…blah, blah, blah… Andrew Sullivan…Trig Palin…perverse uterine spelunking…blah-ditty-blah, blah, BLAH!

David Letterman may or may not be a bitter, old, washed-up late night TV host using every single cheap ploy he can think of to try to become relevant again and Andrew Sullivan may or may not be a mercurial, fantasizing commentator who has little or no experience with female anatomy, but Sarah Palin is a CRAZY KOOK! She talks funny! She's a Christianist gun nut! And she's from Alaska! WHO KNOWS WHAT THOSE PEOPLE DO UP THERE! (At least those non-Native, non-Gaia worshipping people up there.)

And I really — FFS! — don't want to hear any crap about Our Lord and Saviour using kids as props when he signed his 23 Gun Safety Commandments. They wanted him to use them. You could almost say they made him use them. If you do say anything negative about that, keep in mind that you hate children, want to put them in danger, and you're a Nazi!

Seriously, though, I heard that NRA spot and I thought the Ominous Voice conveying an Ominous Message was a bit cheesy, overly complicated, and too narrow. Better to just list celebrities and politicians, both major and minor, who are known to have kids going to schools with armed security (DAVID GREGORY!) and then ask whether those kids deserve to be better protected than any other US citizen's children. Making it all about Obama fails to address just how widespread the hypocrisy is among the elites who are telling us that our Second Amendment rights can be abridged according to their whim.

The President and all of his enablers are the ones who have made this latest gun grabbing ploy About The Children. If they now want to cry about how their opponents are making them live up to their own rules, I'll be happy to give them a Kleenex to wipe their crocodile tears.